The Importance of Reading

Reading makes the world go round. Reading has the power to build nations and destroy cities. What makes us human? The ability to read. But can all humans read? No. (I will explain this phenomenon later in the context of racism) Reading has the power to take you places you’ve never imagined and never wanted to go.

If you can’t read, go learn how. The more you read, the more you know. Learn to read books. Learn to read poems. Learn to read nutrition labels. Learn to read binary code. Learn to read minds. Think of it this way. Reading is like eating. There’s a whole world full of food out there for you to eat, so don’t discriminate. Indulge yourself. Become obese with knowledge. Find your favorite dishes and eat them every night. As a citizen of the human race, you’re standing in the midst of an extensive potluck feast. So tonight for dinner, instead of eating, try reading.

There has never been a better time in the history of the world to start reading than now. It’s easier than cooking and better than drugs. Not everyone reads on the same level, so it’s important to pick the literature that’s right for you. If you feel challenged by big words and punctuation, don’t be discouraged. Try reading something easier like billboards, magazines, or catalogues. Don’t give up. Reading is a useful tool. Reading will grant you power over the culturally inferior. Recite your favorite sonnet to your love interest to put them on their knees. Read a Bible verse to an ethnic minority to save their soul. You can have the power. Simply pick up a book and read it.

FAQ

Is reading fun?

Reading can be fun. It can also be terrifying. Reading is as enjoyable or gruesome as you make it.

Is reading dangerous for children?

It depends. For many children, reading can be a traumatizing experience. With the power to destroy young minds, parental discretion is advised when teaching kids to read. Until the age of ten, I was lost without reading. Then I found how rewarding of an experience it can be.

Can black people read?

No. This is a common misconception. In addition to using jive talk and a collection of click dialects, black people commonly convey their thoughts with one another via the Retinal Authorization Process, or R.A.P. Nowadays a few white people use R.A.P., but this rudimentary form of communication is best left to the nappy-haired and socially unruly.